My path changes

Sadly to say my school idea didn't work out. I actually followed through with everything and took my assessment tests and even signed up for classes. The one thing that I didn't realize was that since I have not been in this state for a year I am charged an out of state fee for every class. I was charged over $700 for just one class!!! I just can't at this time. I feel like I am not able to save money at all and actually find myself barely making it at times. I just have to wait about 8 more months and I will sign up again.

It really annoys me that I cant even go to school because I font have enough money. I want to get married but how are we going to pay for a ring or even a wedding. I don't have family to help with that... I am thinking about getting a second job in place of starting school but I am already worn out with my current job I have no clue how I would stand another.

I'M STRESSED!!!

Patrick really doesn't know what he wants to do either. He finds something than changes his mind. I love him to death and I love that everything he thinks to do just has India and my best interest and I know he really tries but its just stressful. I don't know what's going on.

I feel as though my life is at a stand still and I am not too happy about it. My job sucks but I cant seem to find a way to change it. I am in a rut with money but again I don't see a way that will work to make more. There are obviously ways that will change these things but to factor in India, that we only have one car, my lack of a college degree, my non flexible hours at work and a few other things, my options are limited.

I have made a few more friends at work and am happy with that. I have both Kathleen and Adriana here and it is great to have ppl here I know. Some other girls at work are trying to take me out and give me time to have fun. Its nice I just don't want to loose sight of what I really need to do.

I almost had a breakdown last week and its been really hard. I have however, started drawing and painting more to keep my mind occupied on other things than my problems right now. And of course blogging helps too!